this day, this beautiful day

Laundry hung carefully on the line. Sudden rain.

Sitting in the car with an oceanside view, eating takeaway pizza. Walking down the beach in a mist of drizzle, arms flung out into the wild wind. Whisper-soft sand between my cold toes.

Movies in the afternoon. (It's what you do, when it rains. You curl up on the couch and watch movies. Right?)

Lamb for dinner, lamingtons for dessert. Authentic Australian.

Drive to find the perfect beach. A million soldier crabs, the sound of them skittering along the shoreline. Two hours searching for a spot with no crabs or people or waves. (Or crabs!) Finally, found.

A small break in the clouds. Stars.

Assembling lanterns in the dark. Lighting candles against the wishes of the whipping wind. Pam burning her thumb again and again, determined to get them lit. Photos. Exquisite pain.

(I remember you, lost babies. I remember you, lost mamas.)

Ocean and wind and heartbeat and breath.

Tiny fish jumping in the shallows. Building a fire on the beach. Feeling so thankful for my amazing friend. Imprinting memories behind my eyes.