wandering

photo by Tati

I always wanted to be a gypsy. I always wanted to feel powerful and confident. I always wanted to jump on the back of a brightly painted wagon and leave with the caravan. Chin up, shoulders back, eyes steady -- deep, black eyes, fathomless, brimming with mystery, hinting at secrets I'll never share. I wanted to be the one stared at by strangers, with loathing and with awe, and to let those stares slide right off because I know who I am and what it took to stay alive this long, when nothing comes for free. I wanted to be the wild woman that other mothers hastily usher their children away from, rather than the child, being ushered away.