May 23, 2009

healing [the mystery of memory]

looking back
life looks more like
a steady line but sometimes
at the time
it feels more like
fits and starts
rushes and lulls
and in between
those things
you think you know but
then you find that
you don't really know
anything
at all.

why do we wander
into woods or
by the water
to find ourselves
what can the trees
or rivers
even mountains
ever tell us
about us
where we've gone
and been
and done
why do we leave to
search far away
when we're right here
when we're right now

i look around
and sure it's pretty
but it's empty
empty empty
because there are no other
human faces here
the wilderness just
wasn't made to
love me back
trees and flowers
all so pretty
but they can't tell me
what my name is
or remember when with me
like you can
like you could
if you ever wanted to

golden moments
glow 'mid the dark of
childhood shadows and the

silence

rings in my ears
love was just
too softly spoken
to hear
at times
over the fear
and worry
seems the world is not a
safe place to stand
how can anybody think
we might survive
this scary life that i
somehow accidentally
ended up in

hold your breath
hold my hand
please hold your
questions till
the end

then there are moments
seen in splinters
like broken shards of glass
when we go back
relive them
they leave us bleeding
black and blue then
heal up quick
or maybe slowly
depending on how deep
the cut goes and i
can forgive but i can't seem
to forget
though i've
tried.

but healing is a
process or so
they say
or so they've
said to me before
but maybe it's just
one of those things
they think they know
but they don't
really know
at all.

release
release
release
the tainted
feeling
all pent up
inside to fly away
on the bright wind
of a
new day
new day
new day
new way
new road
new me
it is for
freedom
he has
set us free.

oh, to know you like i could
oh, to love you like i should

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