so many possible futures

I had a vision the other day. It was so real -- like I was physically living it out in that moment. It only took a few seconds, a few heartbeats...

I visioned unlocking a front door and stepping into a house, and I knew it was our house, a house I owned with my husband (yay! a husband!). And the dog pushed past me to get inside (yay! a dog!), and I walked in and set down the baby carrier with my baby sleeping in it (yay! I had a baby!), and dropped my keys back into my bag, and just took a moment to look around the room and think: Wow. This is good. This is my life, and it's really good.
I could feel the sun on my skin, and see the dust motes in the air, and hear my baby snuffle quietly in her sleep and the dog lapping water noisily down the hall.

And then the next second I realized I was actually alone in my kitchen, staring out the window at the January rain, holding a cup of tea in my cold hands. And I didn't really know how to feel about that.